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It sounds kind of corny, but it’s true. We need to take care of ourselves. We need to relax as though our life depends on it. Something about depression, anxiety and trauma symptoms take us far away from self care.

Breathe in and count to ten. Exhale and count to 30 if you must. You should. Not to convince to should-all-over-yourself, but the act of self care will pay off. I assure you.

I wish I had a magic wand to make the day 26 hours instead of 24, so you could fit in the time to do so. Please consider each situation that you find activating or distressing and begin to evaluate how to make these situations more free and easy. But, how?

I think it starts with understanding what you can control and what you can’t. Your thoughts, you can. Your actions, you can. Your beliefs take time to change, but let’s just say that they are rather fixed. They are based on your lived experiences and you have marinated your thoughts on those experiences. Insofar, those reflections have become beliefs. They are what they are. It is what it is.

The vehicle for change lies in not veering left and veering right to take the shirt off of your back to help others all of the time. The empathy you have is crucial, as is help for others based on that. And at risk of talking out of both sides of my (fingers) mouth, I urge you to focus on what you need.